This post is a follow-up message from Pastor Ben's sermon entitled "A High Calling". [Watch video]

Many years ago, our family experienced a couple of Navy deployments. The first one was when Ben was on an aircraft carrier, and the other was when he went to Iraq. Both times meant months of separation. It also meant Ben handed the reigns to me. I was responsible for everything, for finances, repairs, discipline, and all decisions. Basically, I was both mother and father for those months Ben was deployed. The night before he left on the aircraft carrier, we had a family barbecue. One of my sons sighed and said, “Well that's the last good meal we're going to get for a while." It's no secret that Ben is a much better cook than I.

When he returned, I was happy and relieved to give the reigns back to Ben. It took a while for the kids to stop coming to me first for everything. It certainly cemented in my heart the importance of those God-given roles of husband and wife, mother and father. I felt secure again. We women love and need to feel secure. I was happy to have him home and to share the responsibilities of our little tribe.

As my husband was involved with the Marines fighting for our freedom in the second deployment in Iraq, it was good to remember that there is freedom in submitting to my husband. That may seem like an odd statement, but it's one of the benefits of submission as well. I'm free to voice my opinion and concerns with my husband. Knowing that he loves me, wants the best for me, and appreciates my perspective, helps me to submit. There is freedom in knowing and trusting that he has the God-given authority of our marriage and home. When a husband and wife have a mutual respect, they can each feel free to voice their opinions and practice biblical submission.

When I look back over 36 years of marriage, we have certainly had our share of heated discussions. Ben has often grabbed my hand and said, “Let’s pray about this." I learned that even if my emotions didn't match my need to submit, down deep I knew I was honoring God.

Freedom came when I went back to what God says in His perfectly laid out plan for submission. The Bible gives us His plan of authority in a marriage. Ephesians 5:23 says, "For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body." In the beginning of that same chapter we are told to “be imitators of God”. To imitate is to emulate, copy, or model. We are never more Christlike than when we live and imitate His principles. That includes submission.

Maybe submission isn't as hard to define and practice as we think. As I was preparing this article, I looked in many fine books, as well as articles and quotes from the web. In her book, Eve in Exile and the Restoration of Femininity, Rebekah Merkle says, “True submission, in true freedom, of one woman to one man, results in true glory and true fruitfulness." John Piper says, “Submission is the defined calling of a wife to honor and affirm her husband’s leadership, and so help to carry it through according to her gifts.” Could it be that we just need to do it?

What it boils down to is either we trust God or we don’t. Myriads of voices speak into our life. Not all of them are good. We live in an ever-increasing, independent culture, where the personal right to live and choose as one pleases takes precedence, even if it's immoral. The lines of truth, especially from God’s word, are blurred and lost in a society of what's relevant and a right-for-me philosophy. God's truth still remains unchanged.

I’m happy to say my cooking has improved! Ironically the son who made that funny statement about the last good meal, is now a culinary graduate and an incredible cook. I'm free to experiment with cooking, but everyone is more secure if Ben or my son barbecues the meat!